Back to work today

Well I go back to work today. I enjoyed most of the day yesterday.

I headed to Madison yesterday morning to pick up some books, then it was to target to exchange some clothing my sister in law had bought in palm springs. Then it was back home for lunch, housework and schoolwork. Then it was off to swim class. Swang by and dropped Holly off then went by and saw my sister at school. Then came home and dug up the front flower bed with E and replanted in the back. That was fun. Then we watched tv. Then it was off to bed.

Heidi came and got in bed with us last night due to the horrible storm, thus after that didn't sleep well.

Well, gotta get busy and get school done.

I am in a funk today again got to get out of this funk.

Well, I am suffering from beauty withdrawls. It is already been 3 days back in the saddle and my mind and heart are still in the North Georgia mountains. God I would move there in a heartbeat. I would even love to move out closer to sipsy or closer to monte santo mountain. Just somewhere gloriously connected to nature. I know it is not so, but it seems you are closer to God there. We would probably defile the mountains by adding tv and computers to the mix. Oh well, I will go back to Georgia in a couple of months hopefully to the hot air balloon festival. We will see.

I was off yesterday and today. I have to go back to work tomorrow and it will be like 40 hour work week till I am off again. Even though I don't work full time. It seems I work full time. I look foward to the day when I don't work at all. I think Eric and I are closer when I don't work. Enough whining about that.

No acting class for me this week my teacher had to go to Milano /NY. His Milano trip got cancelled and instead of NYC, he had to go to California. So next week he is going to take the Milano trip and NYC trip so we probably wont meet next week either. We will see. I hate when I don't get to go to class. However, he has asked me to read 2 books so maybe I can get them in before I go back to class again.

I am going to start the 12 week plan over again. I blew it while I was out of town. I have got to decide if I am going to stick to the plan or not. Time will tell.

Well enough from me.

This is what we looked at on the way home. 

This is what we heard at night. Our campsite was right by this. 

Lakeview at the campsite.  

Getting Back!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, We are back you can read my hubby's blog if you really want the detailed version of our trip. I am just going to hightlight. It was a great time. The Weather was my favorite part. Friday was one of the best days of my life to date. It seemed everything was in sync. The planents must have been aligned. lol. It was a God day for sure. The hubby was in a great mood. The kids got along. I didn't have to do laundry or dishes. No contraversy over anything. IT was nice. The worst part of the trip was coming home. I didn't want to. lol. It was kind of depressing to me. oh well, yesterday came and here we are.

I have decided to take a different approach with curriculum next year with the girls. I am not sure what it is going to be yet. It will be different though. I don't feel they are getting the full benifit from homeschooling. We could do a lot more I think. So we will.

Acting class and oot

Acting class went well. We had a little party for the teacher. It was nice. It was his birthday. I didn't get to participate in an exercise, but I feel that I am learning a great deal regardless. More than I have ever learned. I was asked to read a couple of books by my teacher. The Meisner approach and The Ferverent Years. I am going to borrow them from a friend, if I can remember to remind her to bring them to me to class. Our class is about to lose 3 members to NYC. They are moving there and so in their honor, we will be putting on a slew of skits that probably don't relate to one another, but it should be entertaining none the less.

OTT means OUT OF TOWN!!! That is where we will be going. I hope it doesn't rain, but if it does, we are used to it. Every time we go camping it rains.I don't know why we expect it to be different this time. Oh well HAPPY BUNNY to everyone!!!!!!!! I hope this Sunday the you find your prize egg or this year. hee hee.

off tomorrow. woohoo!!!!!!!!!!

I know it sounds crazy, but I hate working 4 days in a row. It is a lot to do when you have housework, school work, and whatever else comes my way. I am glad that I wll be off tomorrow. That will be grand. I have acting class tomorrow night. Then I have to work Wednesday and Thursday. Then I will be out of town all weekend.

I have to get some head shots made for sure. That should be intresting.


Well must go chill before bed.

Better Days ahead!!!!!

It seems that is the case for us. We have been working really hard to pay off debt, shed pounds, and plan a camping trip. It all works out. I am pretty excited about all ow what is going on that is for sure. Especially the debt thing. I think that is the best move we have ever made.

I am so proud of my hubby. He is getting raises right and left at work because he works so hard. I am very proud of him.

I started a new 12 week workout program this week. I didn't go full blown with it, but I am very proud of what I did do and I hope this will result in looking good in a swim suit. I have had several people tell me that cocoa butter will rid you of stretch marks. Anybody in the blogging world tried this? I would love some feed back. I am down to 138 now. I started at 185. That is not my heavist weight, but that was pregnancy related so it doesn't count. lol. So if my calculations are right that is a small child or 47 pounds. Amazing. I still can't comprehend it. I just hope to stay that way.

Oh, and we have a camping trip planned for the Helen Georgia. That will be Easter weekend. This will be the first Easter that I have ever not been in a church somewhere, but I can promise you this, I will be able to worship God where I will be. It is a haven there in Helen. It is lovely.

Acting Class

Just got home from acting class. It was pretty fun. We ended at about 10:10, but a couple of old friends wanted me to go to Applebee's with them so I went over and had some water (started a new thing this week Body for Life which equals 80 oz water a day). Probably want be doing that every week for sure. It was nice to do that. I haven't done that in awhile.


Class was great. I got to participate this week actually, I was first up. Did an exercise. I am just amazed how simple things can be wiht acting. It is being open and real. Exposing yourself for who you really are. Onstage is the only place one can actually be themselves. It was a great time.

Off to bed now, I have to get up and go workout in the morning.

Busy, Busy Busy,

That is what today was. I got up around 6. the past 2 nights, I have slept extremely well and awakened early.

Did a little house work here and there, spent some time with e, paid money on Credit Card, got ready for church.

After church, we came home grabbed some lunch and headed over to Holly's b'day party. It was fun, but tiring. We went to Wendy's with Scott afterward and now we are home. I am about to pass out. I think I will power nap for about 15 minutes.

No Word about acting class, I might actually get to go. I am keeping my fingers crossed.

Tomorrow, I am going to start Body for LIfe workout. Learn more by clicking below.

http://www.bodyforlife.com/


It basically will be to lose 10 pounds and some inches of fat I haven't rid after 55 pounds have been shed. It is a 12 week program that will put me at the end of May and right in time for seim season. It should be intresting.

It really hasn't been that long.

I blogged several days ago and I realize now that it didn't go through. Who knows what it was about. It is lost in cyberspace.

The past 2 off days have been glorious, beautiful days. From the sun set last night to the sunset tonight. Heaven has to be close to feeling like today. I wished I lived somewhere like this all the time. Praise God for the beautiful weather.

Enjoyed spending some much needed time with Eric last evening. Props to the mother in law for keeping the kidos. Spent some much needed kid time today. Props to Eric for allowing me to do that today. Getting ready for Holly's 10 year old birthday party tomorrow. Wow. She is growing up. We will be skating away for sure. No boys at the party and no babies was the qualifications for invitation this year. We stretched it a little with my nieces since they are family and with one friend of ours because the chick is so cool and Holly loves her. So it is so girly tomorrow. We are excited. We picked up her zelda gamecube game, the new one, game cube cable and a nice kite from forever flying. It is in the shape of a dragon. Awesome cool stuff. Oh and we picked her up some yugioh figurenes. She is so excited. I am glad that God blessed us to be able to bless her.

Hopefully, I will actuall get to go to acting class this week that will be fun.

Rainy days and monday's always get me down, not really

I just thought that was appropriate today in Alabama it is monday and raining.

busy weekend at work. WE had inventory. It went well we all left work around 6.

I have to work tonight as well. IT should be intresting to see how things went yesterday and see how it will go tonight.

Both kids are not feeling well. They have the sinus junk. I have some allergy issues and Eric has a headache.

I think they are skipping swimming and chess today. They feel gross.

I would love to skip work tonight and go to my acting class. The past few weeeks it has been on Monday night due to the instructors schedule. Oh well.

For some reason lately, my spirtual side as awakened. I feel refreshed and renewed about praising God through music. I have been listening to a lof of praise and worship music and some christian stuff. I try to listen to it on the way to work so that I can go in with a good attitude and not be negative.

I am going to try to catch a nap before work. I took some dimetapp and I am getting a little groggy. I am not going to fool with minor house work. Just some laudry today. Got most everything else done.

off to lalala land.

Testing

I began preparing the girls for there standford 10 test that will occur next month. I am glad I started this early. They really need work on comprehension and several skills that will be included that we have not covered yet. I will over the next couple of months try to prepare them so they will do well on the test. Do I expect them to get every question right, no, but I just want them at least to be on grade level. I worry more about Heidi because she is still not where I would like her to be reading wise. She just doesn't get some sounds. I am going to really try before the end of the year to have her reading very well.

Busy weekend so you may not here from me. We have inventory Sunday so this weekend at work will be busy. If you think of coming in office depot in decatur alabama, don't. Less customers the better. Especially on Sunday. Well I must get to bed we have classes, skate day, work tomorrow. Then I have to be at work saturday at 8:30. I am thankful I have my job it has helped us out tremendously.

If we can get on track with finances, I will be a completley fullfilled person That means that everything will be in sink in my life. smart kids, finincial sound, personally filled and spirtiuall solid. It probably wont happen, but one can dream.

I have been thinking, I know it is scary, but

I began my day today as usual with 1 cup of cherios and 1/2 cup of 2%milk. Got the girls school work started then preceded to clean up our bedroom. I am preparing to have a yard sale so I decided to clean out my closet a little. I came across a lot of sentimental things like cards and pictures. I saw photos of the girls when they were small and it really made me realize how big they are getting. They are beginning to ask more serious questions, and think of more serious things. It is a bitter sweet moment really. You think first that you are proud of what God has helped you raise and then you think they are not even going to think twice about you in a couple of years. As a parent it is your goal to raise self suficient human beings that have good values and morals and will impact the world in some small way, but the selfish side want them to remain in awe of who you are.

I also came across some things I had been given by Eric. It made me realize that we have come a long way together. This year we will be married 12 years. We still love each other. We still want to be around each other and the times we don't, we are ok with that to. We have seperate intrest, but we are intrested in what each other is doing. We have a great friendship/ relationship.

As I waited to pick up my glasses today, I ran across an article about Jamie Lee Curtis in some magazine. It had some pretty good wisdom in it. She said now is not her time. Most people hit a mid life crisis and think that it is there time and the kids are hitting teenage years about the same time. She talked about how it is her children's time to be the star. I really began to think about that in regards to what I want out of life. I have made some sacrifices as a parent in regards to my own personal life. Yeah I wanted to be a mom, wife, etc. I have given up my career to homeschool my own children. I love it though. I wouldn't change a thing. I have had clear direction up until this point. I don't know what we will do next year. I don't know if we will continue to homeschool or not. Time will tell. I have a couple of months to decide. I really want to wait and get there test results back.


Well thus the conclusion of my thoughts. I am pretty happy with the way my life has turned out. I wished we would have been stronger finincial at this point, but you can't have everything.

I can't see I can't see, and yes, I have my eyes open!!!

The girls and I had to go to the eye dr. and experience the dreded dialation along with both girls. I am typing with my eyes closed right now. So if something is majorly fowled up, excuse it. It was sad I had to go to the grocery store afterwards and had to ask old ladies to help me read the calories and fat of of cans. It was pretty humorous actually. The funny part is that I actually drove like this. I think I drove better than normal. lol. All in a day in Wendy's Wacky World.

Busy weekend and most likely a busy week.

We celebrated my husbands birthday all weekend. It was a riot. Eric and I both were recipents of selfless gifts this weekend. Amazing. That is all I can say.

I have a busy week ahead. I work m w f sat. We have inventory Sunday while the stupid store is open. That will be fun. Loads of Fun.

I will start my acting class next week. I am truly excited about that. I never do anything like this. Meaning it is pricey, but I really feel this is what I need to do. I expect this will make me into a better person.

destiny

do I belive in it? I am not sure, if destiny means things happen a certain way for a certain reason then maybe I do.

Tonight, this woman at work bared her soul to me. I've never met her in my whole life. She talked to me about her son being in Iraq. She was moved to tears. She apoligized for rambling, but I didn't mind. It was amazing. It felt like a God moment. Like it was meant to be. Even at my minial job, I can be used. God ministered to that lady through me. It was so awesome. Thanks, Lord for using a worn out vessel.

In other news, I have been helping the kids with their art fair projects that are due Friday. It is hard not to do them myself, but I must let them do it. I am such a perfectionist. ARGH. I will allow them to do it themselves.

I am off tomorrow. Yeah.

Wow What an amazing experience!!!!!

I am just amazed at the class I just got home from. I sat for 4 hours in a class and it felt like 2 minutes. The teacher is pretty amazing. His name is Frank.He is an italian New Yorker. He is very inspiring. He is a amazing man. He says he is a jerk, but I beg to differ. It was amazing watching this man work. I am looking foward to him peeling the layers off of me from previous acting experience and learning who I am as an actor. Pretty amazing. My new acting teacher is friends with Phil Hoffman.
http://archive.thejujube.com/Themes/philhoffman.html

I told Eric that this guys seems to be the real deal. He seems to be in the know of what is going on. As I have said before, I don't want to be famous. I probably couldn't handle it. I just want to learn and respect the field of acting. I think that Frank will be a good person to pull out the things that I need to let shine as an actress. It should be intresting.

Going to see

I am going to check you the acting class out tonight in Madison. It is by this guy who works or has worked in NY. It should be pretty intresting. I don't know if I will actually take the class, I will know more after all is said and done.

Everything else is looking ok. My JcPenny catalog finally came. I found a comforter in there my mom is going to buy for me just because she wanted to do somethig nice for me. I thought it was very thoughtful of her. My parents always are doing things for the kids which is great, but ever once in awhile it is nice when they do something for me. It makes me feel like a little kid again.


Finanically, I guess everything is as good as it could be. It is very overwhelming sometimes. IT will all work itself out. One of these days we will be debt free. We got approved for our new roof via insurance, we have got to come up with the deductible.

Obsessive, decisions and Expectations

I am such an obsessive person. I run things in the ground. Yes, it is true. I hate that I am this way. being this way many times leads to diasappointment and chest pain. Arggh. I got obsessive about my weight and lost 55 pounds. I still am obsessed with that. Even though I have started eating more. I have decided to say when I start to eat something I shouldn't. Go ahead you just want to be fat. Go ahead. Eat it. Same thing with money I want to spend. Go ahead be in debt for the rest of your life. Go ahead. Is it so wrong that I want to be a good wife, a good mother, a good daughter, sister, daughter-in-law, a good grandaughter, skinny, debt free and be an actress. (not famous really, but just do theatre and film for the rest of my life and get paid for it. ) Is that to much to ask? Who knows? I say I want these things, but I exercised 1 this week, I didn't clean the house as good as I could, I didn't spend as much time with my family as I should, I didn't dote on my husband and tell him how wonderful he is all week. I am fooling myself. I fold under pressure. I am choosing my on fate. I must decide what I want and let noone or anything stand in my way.


Surgery Update (guys might want to skip this part)


I got an all clear from the dr. this week. Seems like my period will be absent for several years anyway. Then we will just have to have the plumbing taken out.

Acting Class

There is an acting class in Huntsville taught by this guy from New York. I may go visit it on my next Tuesday off to check it out. A couple of my friends go and they love it. I can't go on a regular basis so I may see if I can go 1 a month or something. It should be fun regardless to check it out and see my friends I have not seen in awhile.


In my acting book, I am learning that studying the posture of gymnast and dancers will help one learn to carry themselves on stage better.

I have nothing to hide.

I was thinking of this yesterday. Some people are very complex people. They are like the character of Shrek or an onion, they have layers. Some of the layers are open and some of them are locked for no one to see. I am trying to really put deep thought into this because I desire to understand a person like this. I am sure most of it stems from their past. I assume this because I am a person that doesn't have locked layers.

(I don't think I do anyway. I am pretty transparent and have been all my life. You can ask my hubby if I have changed very much, he will tell you no. The reason I know this is because he was asked recently. And my friend Scott said I am like a little girl.)

Anyway, my past is not dark, or filled with regrets. Maybe that is why it is open to the naked eye. It is hard for anyone to say that they wouldn't change one thing about their life. Even the few times that I had hardship enter my life, I truly can say that I appreciate the experience.

So how do I understand a person so complex with locked layers? I don't know. When I don't understand a person, I just try to except them and love them for who they are. I guess that is all one can do.

Cold morning, acting update

It was cold this morning. I didn't want to get out of bed for sure. Burr.


Last night I was very tired when I got home, but I was wound up from work. I worked my butt off last night. Came home and decided to stay up and read some of my acting books that I am reading. The book is about building a character from ground up. It is pretty inspiring. So after reading I decided to search the web for possible acting opp. I stumbled on to this film sight where it list movies being filmed in Alabama and there is an audition coming up that I think that I am going to try out for. It will probably be an extra or something, but that would be ok with me. I just want the experience. It will be next weekend in Sheffield, Alabama. It is some civil rights movie with Louis Gosset Jr., Naomi Judd, Chris Christophersen etc.


I am a little excited about this.

What is love?

Unconditional love is Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not selfseeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Just thinking, danger danger!!!!!

What is Christianity? and who am I? I am a seeker for sure. I seek the right path on a daily basis. My background is that I studied the Bible for about 15 years inductively. I read the Bible through many times, I did this study and that study. I gained much knowledge. I sincerly hid God's word in my heart. I allowed God to guide me in the steps I took in my life. A devasting spiritual event happened that I do not intend to write and relive. I still continued to study and seek out God. Then, I came to a spirtual point where I didn't want to study, I didn't want to learn anymore. I just started sorting. I came to a point where I wanted to know what God was saying to me and What man had taught me. (Till this day, I am still sorting.) In all honesty and sincerity, I have truly tried to seek God and allow him to guide me in my life.

Now to the thinking part, recently I have been thinking about why I don't study anymore intensely. I read on occasion, but not on a regular basis. I have no desire to study like I use to. God is still guiding me. I belive that God can use anything he created to speak to me. He reveals himself to me continually in my life. So, while thinking about all of this. I began to think about religon and beliefs, church. I feel so many times as Christians, we lose the realness of who God is. We say we our living out of the box, but we just change boxes. we get a different sized box, we get a new set of rules, we change things up, but still we dont' allow God to work were he wants to. I am not saying that we shouldn't have church services that do this and that. Maybe I think that whatever we do should just be us and not prepackaged. I can only relate to things I understand inside my box. That sickens me. How can I relate to someone who I have nothing in common with. Example., I have a friend who the only thing we have in common is where we work. We don't have similar taste, style or religion. So how do I relate to that person. I be real I think and show that person God's love while at work. I don't have to invite this person to small group or church or anything. I just show her God' s lvoe at work. That is being real. I have no desire to hang out with this person, in all honesty. I don't really care to be around her, but I feel God is using me to plant seed in this person life. I haven't honestly thought about being a witness to this person, but opportunity has arisen several times. So , I stepped up to the plate and took a swing at it. So God has used this opp to teach me that all I have to do is be relative to the situation and not add anything extra to the situation just be myself and be open to minister to whoever God places in my path. Maybe this is not the way, Maybe I am totally off base, but for now, I am not at place to do indepth study, or I don't want to hang out with people that I can't relate to, I am being me. To thine on self be true. I guess the key is like the beining of this quest of thought Who am I ? Am I a product of God or Man?

Changes and such

Very busy week. Last week, I went back to my regular work schedule. Finally, I had recovered from being put to sleep and now I am tired from being back at work so many hours. Not complaing by any means, I am just happy to be here. Got through the week. The girls had valentine stuff to do for their homeschool coop classes they take once a week on Friday. That is was fun. I love holidays. I guess that stems from my parents putting a lot of emphasis on them.


Eric and I had a great day yesterday. We slept in, then we got up and headed to huntsville to get the girls a new swim suit for valentine's day. They needed a practice suit The fabric on the speedo and nike brand doesn't wear like the walmart suit does. So we dropped some dough, but hopefully it will make for a good investment.

After the swim shop, we headed to have our annual valentine day meal at humphries. We had nice conversation as always. We talked about how our perspective on things is changing for the better. Whether it be Church, Fiances, health , child rearing, or our relationship. We both agreed that we were moving in the right direction. We ended our valentine day with a trip to some desert shop which violates any diet. It was pretty nice. Then it was home and then we hung out over at Scott's and watched a great valentine movie "sixteen candles". It was a nice valentine's day for me. Really with Eric, every day is valentine's day. I am not trying to be cheesy or stupid, even though it soulds like it. We are both very fortunate to be able to celbrate the love and relationship we have every day of our lives. That happens when you find your soul mate.

hodge podge of thoughts and such.

Recovery from surgery is so far good. No site of George anywhere.

Budgeting money is difficult, but it will work out.

Income tax will be here soon to help kick debt in the pants.

I am off today yippee.

I was supposed to go on a field trip, but decided to do something for myself and be a selfish selfish thing and stay at home. hee hee.

I love Eric so much. He is a great guy. He is the most wonderul man in the whole world.

I can't wait to get back to exercising. This is the last week of recovery, before I go back to the dr.

Must go now.

Today

I had a pretty good day, until I went to buy groceries. I hate walmart. The past couple of months we have been spoiled. We have been shopping at publix.

Anyway back to the good part. We went to homeschool classes. I taught my pe classes. Then we went to skate day at the skate castle. After that it was time for swim lessons and while Holly swam Heidi and I headed over to look for a book at the learning tree for school. After no success, she wanted to go to pro music to look at what else, drums. She was so cute in there.

After that headed over to pick up holly and then it was back home to drop them off.

I watched a littl of actor's studio.

After that, it was off to the grocery store to buy stuff.

Then spent a little time with the girls lookin through yughio cards.

all in all it was a 9 out of 10 off day.

My reflection

I am reflecting on planning. Since hopefully we may, and I stress may be out of debt in 3 years. We are going to have to have heart and strong will to make it happen. Once the snowball rolls, it will roll.

(back to my reflection)

My plan is once we are out of debt, I am weighing on my options.

1. continue to homeschool and go back to school

options for school

a. pe teacher high school
b. pe/coach college level requires a masters degree sometimes dr.
c. athletic trainer
d. sports medicine dr.

2. continue to school and take acting classes to pursue my true passion. It is not that I want to be famous or anything like that. I just want to pursue acting.

Just like music, acting and sports have always been escapes for me. I have put those aside because of other responsibilities. I believe once we are debt free, eric and I will be able to focus on our future and our children's future.

What is going on with me?

I just don't understand why my body is in high strung mode, unless it is is pms. I may not have a period as I used to know it,time will tell, but I can still have symptoms which are normally:

1. moodness
2. cramps
3. anxiety attacks due to the moodness
4. depression

I have experienced all of these this week.

I feel like the financial world is closing in on me.

Dave said it would be like this. I look at our finances and I think how the heck did we back into this mess again. Then, I answer, stupid sin. I am determined this time to get out and stay out at all cost. I am tired of budgeting. I am tired of scrapping the bottom. I am tired of all of it. Financial, we suck. Who the heck did we think we where? Why do we need so much crap? Once I get out of debt, I am going to go on a trip to the mountains and just breathe.


Rough night at the Depot for me. I made a mistake by hitting the wrong button on the telezon and deleting all the scans I had made in 1:30 hours. So I had to go back and complete them. It made me so stressed and mad that It took me so many times to go back and fix what I had messed up. I am still not sure that it is all right.


I need to be in bed right now. I didn't get up until late today. I was tired. Here we are again at 11:30 almost awake. I would be all paniced out if I went to bed right now. My anxiety is kicked in. I am about to go do some yoga to relax. I love yoga. It is an excape.

I know that I sould pretty frustrated right now. I know that it will all work out. Even in my sinful state, God still loves me. Thank God for that. I don't love myself very much right now. sigh. I am hating myself for allowing my finiances to get in this mess. At least I have figured out why I can't say no to Eric. The bottom line is I dont' want him to get mad at me. I don't want him to be frustrated. I don't want him to do without anything. Boy, Dr. Phil would be all over this. I am trying to change this and let him get mad about money.

He filled out our taxes tonight. We will actually be getting something back this time. Pretty amazing. It is more than what we used to get back. Hopefully this will help us start our emergency fund and catch up some things.

I feel wrong for even asking God to help me get out of this mess. I feel bad for even turning to him. I know that he is there, but I am just ashamed.

First day of what

It is already the first day of Febuary. I can't believe it. Time flies that is for sure.


Paying off bills is pretty slow. It is taking off time. We have tested our committment several times. We both want it to pay off. I figure we better do it now, before our children know what certain brand clothing they choose to wear. They already are so adapted to our want lifestyle. All kids this day and time need to be told no more often when asking for wants. This will hopefully teach them to manage their money and marry someone who manages money well.


I did some yoga today. This is the first time since my surgery. I was a little concerned, but when my body yelled stop I just stopped. I was encouraged by the amount of flexibility that I have maintained. I must do yoga for the rest of my life. I haven't done yoga actually in about 3 weeks and similar symptoms are creaking back in. I have almost turned my ankle several times. I got a catch in my hip a couple of times. Leg cramps, painful. I am going to try yoga for this week and then hopefully I can get back to the bike in a week or so. I need to start walking again. Maybe I will do that next week.

Must catch up on some reading.

Long time, no type

It has been several days since I updated my blog. wow. I didn't realize it has been so long. I have been extremely busy though. Also, I have an allergy attack. I cleaned out the filter in my vacumn cleaner. It is one of those bagless kinds. Dust got up in my sinus cavity. It has left me with a nasty sinus cold. Many of you will be glad to know that I am losing my voice. It actually comes and goes. Your prayers have been answered.

I have been trying to contact and old friend. I don't know what is going on. She want return my calls. I left a message with her mom to call me. If I remember correctly, she is a procrastinator. I was trying to get in touch with her so a bunch of my old friends could have lunch together. We will see if that will happen. This girl I am reffering to is one of my best friends from school. We loved Wham, David letterman. She introduced me to some cool music. We would quote movies together. We played tennis together. It was fun times. I have an overwhelming desire to get in touch with her for some reason. Who knows/

All is ok here at the home front.

Dave Ramsey was right

He said when you got serious about paying off debt things would go wrong. I took the girls to the dentist today. Heidi is missing permanent teeth according to x rays. Holly' s permanent teeth are to big for the space allowed, she needs more room. So she has to have 8 teeth pulled 4 at a time. After insurance, it will cost around 300 dollars to get this work done. I am afraid if we do nothing, more money will have to be spent later on. It is not that we wont have the money but that is 300 dollars that wont go to debt. Life is full of issues like this. It is hard to stay foccused on this. I can't wait to get settled into paying off bills. A couple of months from now when things are stable or more stable that will be wonderful.


I am back in the saddle on my diet. I am eating around 20 points a day on the weight watchers guidelines. It doesn't sound like a lot, but it is plenty to survive on. Oh well, I want to lose 10 more pounds and tone up before summer. I would love to go to the tanning bed, but I will just wait until spring comes so I can lay out and get sun the nartual way.

Justice Served

http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/01/26/store.shooting.ap/index.html

Country store becomes shootout site
Wednesday, January 26, 2005

ATLANTA, Georgia (AP) -- \When two men walked into a popular country store outside Atlanta, announced a holdup and fired a shot, owners Bobby and Gloria Doster never hesitated. The pair pulled out their own pistols and opened fire.
The armed suspect and his partner were killed. The Dosters won't be charged, according to local officials, because they were acting in self-defense.
"I just started shooting," said Gloria Doster, 56. "I was trying to blow his brains out is what I was trying to do."
Shoats Grocery & Package near Crawford, 70 miles east of Atlanta, is a well-known spot where locals stop for breakfast biscuits or lunch. Gloria Doster said the two men who came there Monday had something else in mind.
She was rearranging boxes of soda by the store's front door when a man wearing a wig walked inside, the fake hair draped in front of his face.
"I asked him, 'Can you see to walk?"' Doster said. Then she noticed a second man behind him wearing a mask. He announced a holdup.
One man grabbed Gloria Doster and pushed her toward the register. She said the other kept his gun on her 62-year-old husband, who also goes by the name Shoats.
She said she tried to open the register, but one of the men told her she wasn't moving fast enough and tried to shoot her husband. He missed -- and his gun jammed.
At that point, Bobby Doster pulled out a .380-caliber handgun and shot one of the suspects. Gloria Doster then went for a 9 mm pistol she keeps near the register.
"All hell broke loose," she said. "I was trying to shoot and dial 911 at the same time."
Both suspects took cover behind the store's meat counter as the Dosters opened fire. Gloria Doster said she doesn't know how many bullets were fired, or how many times the suspects were hit.
Police arrived about five minutes after receiving Gloria Doster's call; the suspects died a short time later at a hospital.
The bloodshed, nevertheless, startled Gloria Doster, who has been around guns all her life, and has used them for target shooting. "But I never figured I'd have to use them on anybody," she said.
She said the worst thing that's happened in the seven years the couple has owned the store was an after-hours break-in by teenagers three years ago. The burglars were promptly arrested.

Day 2 planning

Well, I have been doing a lot today. Mostly tweaking a budget to get us on track. It is going to be tough. I can already tell for us to stay on track. It just must be done. I am probably going to turn into the mean old ogar wife and mom about money. Someone has to be th ogar, I guess. I need to take the capital one commerical and run to my family no no no no no. I spend money to. I am just cheap and don't make big purchases.

I staye up till midnight last night. I watched some stuff on Jonny Carson. Jay Leno had his whole show dedicated to him. Then, I watched Larry King show. It was all cool and brought back many memories. Oh well, times have changed as they said this is a new era.

Planning for a new year

Eric and I are starting to work on our plan for this year. Losing weight, paying off debt, and getting our family better organized to do more than watch tv and play gamecube. I would love to be debt free including our mortgage by the time I am 40. that is 6 years from now. Even if we pay off everthing except for the house. I would be thrilled. I know that the girls having a car and insurance is just around the corner. I want us to be prepared to provide for them and not have to go broke doing it. I think that we will give the girls the option to work if they want to. Just to have spending money and start saving money as well. I want them to learn how to manage money from the get go. I never did because I never had any. I didn't work very much. Eric never did because he didn't have any either. I want them to learn early that it is ok not to have everything there heart desires. Anyway enough of that rant.

I started reading Dave Ramsey's book total money makeover. I can relate a lot of my mindset to weight loss to the paying off debt. It is a pretty good book for sure.

The recovery is coming along pretty good. I am anxious to get back to my old habit of exercise and I am looking forward to having some energy. I know it is only been one week, but I just want recovery to go quicker. I miss my yoga.

Oh well, that is my life for today. I must get back to house work. I am trying to recover from the weekend

Trying to get back to my old self.

That is just what I am trying to do. I feel like I am gaining weight. I have got to get back to losing for sure.

Recovery seems to be doing ok. My employer has really been good to me. They cut my hours considerable since I can't stand for a long period of time. Everytime, I start using those stomach muscles, I get nauseated. It is crazy that is for sure.

We got a chance to see the movie coffee and cigarettes. Very artsy movie. It was pretty intresting. I did a play similar in style in college. Anyway, on a scale of 10, I give it a 7. So if you don't have anything else to watch, rent it. Tiffany was there. It was good seeing her again. I look foward to seeing her tonight. I look foward to emailing her in the future.

It is pretty cute to see the girls get excited about their yu gi oh battle. I get tickled at them. They went to books a million today to trade and battle with the kids in our area. I can't wait to hear about it.

Well must be off to get ready to go work the longest day I have worked since my surgery.

later.

Work overload

Went back to work last night. Maybe I shouldn't have. I had more pain, other issues, etc. I slept so hard last night that it is unbelievable. I feel somewhat better this morning. I felt ok until I got to work yesterday. Then, within 5 minutes, I was drained. I worked 4 hours. I have a call in to the dr. to see if all the effects that I experienced were ok and normal. It is going to take me some time to get over this funk feeling I guess.

In other news, all is going well in the morgan household. Heidi made the swim team. We are very proud of her. She will be starting in a 10 week class. She will stay there until her strokes are good enough to get her to the end of the pool. Hopefully, by summer, she will be ready to compete in the 8 and under swim meets. It will be fun for both of them.

This is me now for those of you who don't know. 

Boy was I have shed some pounds. I found these photo's today. This was about 3 years ago. wow

Pardon the Vent

I am just in awe of the audacity of people.
Some people don't want to earn anything anymore. They expect people to take care of them. They want a free ride.

On the other side, you have some people that think they are the bomb. They think they have it all figured out. They want to spew what they know in your face because they think you are not where God wants you to be and he has nominated them to bring that fact to your attention.


I just stand in awe of the whole situation. Why can't people just live there life and not try to change other people. Isn't that really God's job?

Who cares that I have a friend who allows people to take advantage of them by running a boarding house. If that makes that person fill fullfilled so be it. Maybe they don't feel taking advantage of. Maybe that offers them some self worth.

If God wants her to do something different, then want he show her,

I know in mine and Eric's life that God has always guided us. He has been faithful to put us where we can be most effective. Are we perfect? A big NO!, but it is not about being perfect and following a list of rules. It is about having the right heart attitude. We don't need other people throw in a list of legalized rules our way to show us how to live. We have the Bible and the Holy
Spirit. I am not saying that God does use other people to help us. I am just saying that God doesn't rule with an iron fist to you and I right now. His love is more like a father's love to his son.

I guess in my life I am learning to experience God finally. I don't know how completely. I probably never will because I am feeble minded, but I am seeking. I am true seeker of the truth. I know God is real in my life. I know He loves me. I know he sent Jesus to die for me. I believe in that. I know he wants me to show others that love by using the gifts that he has given me. That is all I know. Everything else I could tell you would just be my opinion. I don't believe there is this secret formula to living right. I believe that it differs for all of us.


"If God wants us all to be the same, Why did he make us so different?" Jena Malone (Mary). SAVED

Still Recovering

Yes, I am still recovering from outpatient surgery. I just get up a do a little at a time and then go lay back down. Last night we went out for dinner, just to get out of the house and then headed over to books a million. I was wiped after that . Just totally wiped out. I got a little pale at books a million according to Eric. Came home laid down on the couch and watched a little tv, then it was off to bed.

Yesterday, I watched Oprah (don't tell anybody). I normally don't care for her show, but she had a special on the tsunami and all. It was pretty moving. One of her guest that had actually been in Sri Lanka when it hit, made an intresting comment . He said after going through all of this, I have learned a lot. I have decided that there should not be 2 tragidies through all of this, but that my life has been spared for a reason. I have a purpose in life and must find out what that is. I don't know right now, but I will find out. I have learned to live life by the minute. Every moment is precisous. It was something of that nature. It was amazing to me that through all of that, he learned to sieze the day basically. At that moment when all of that hit, those people were not even assured of the next breath. It made me think that even though a tsunami is not upon me my last breathe could be. What will I use my last breath for. Will I beat down or lift up. What is my purpose? Why am I left here? Who am I supposed to encourage and lift up that I jsut pass by. Just thinking out loud.

Just a Little Recovery Humor.  

Still Recovering

I am still a little under the weather today. I want to get up and do stuff, but I just don't have the strength to do a whole lot. I spilled something in the floor. Eric offered to clean it up, but I told him I would get it and it wiped me out trying to clean it up. I have been up for about 1:30 doing odd things and now I am ready for a nap. I am trying to build my stength back because e goes back to work tomorrow and I go back to work on Wednesday order pending from the dr. I am waiting for a call from him now. I am very happy with the whole procedure so far and feel very blessed that I am still here. God has given me another opportunity to minster his love to other people. I know that may sound cheesy to some, but I am truly sincere with it.

I am going to try to get some reading in today. Along with Holly, I am reading some classic books that I have never read like Phantom of the Operea, White Fang, little women, etc. It is cool that she is getting old enough to read this type stuff that I love to read.

I look foward to riding my bike again. I figure that will be a couple of weeks away. maybe 4 weeks when I go back to the dr.We will see.


All is well here on the home front. No worries or complaints. It was cool to be able to catch up on some tv and not do anything else for a couple of days. Now I am ready to get back to the normal go and do place, I am pretty independant.


Recover in the fast lane.

Recovery continued

I am very bloated from the oxygen they gave me I guess. My throat pain is gone. Still haven't felt much pain. I am gaining my energy back slowly. I can get up and get myself something to drink, I can get up and do a few chores. I am trying not to over do it. I probably will skip church tomorrow because it will take a lot of energy just to get ready. We will see. Again thanks for all those prayers and thoughts and food.

Recovery day 2

Up early this morning because I slept much of the day yesterday. I went in and out of sleep anyway. There is no comparison the pain that I usually experience to what I am experiencing now..Usually cycle cramps are over a 10. I would have to say they are about a 2-3. They are just dull. I hurt more in my throat. Everyone that I have taked to said they probably ran a tube down my throat. I am going to try to do without the loracet today. Since I just now woke up, time is the only thing that can tell. I still can't sit up for long periods of time. I get pretty loopie. Speaking of which, I am going to go lay back down.

Surgery complete

I had my surgert today. Other than being comfortable numb for the meds, I am doing ok. I really suprised. I hope tomorrow goes so well.

Clowns Make Me Happy!!! Smile!!! 

Pardon the reflection

Anytime that I go through surgery or test or anything major, I reflect on my life. It is probably natrual I guess. My surgery is tomorrow morning at 6:15. I have a lot of emotion flowing through me right now. I am happy that hopefully health wise I will feel better after this. We all have concern of being put to sleep. I especially do. On one hand, I know that there is always that chance something may go wrong. I think gosh I am so fortunate to live the life I have already live. I have everything anyone could ever desire on this side of life. On the other hand, I think gosh I have so much to live for. I am very blessed with great husband, great kids,great parents, great family, and great friends.

So, in these few hours before my surgery, all I really have to say is sieze the day. Every day of my life that is what I try to do. Show love to others, just as Christ did. That is what I try to teach my kids. I hope if they ever learn anything from me that is it.

I want to say thanks in advance for all the prayers lifted up for me from so many, it means a lot. I will post as soon as I am feeling better.

In famous words, "I'll be back".

Alterbridge Rocks!!!!

Went to see them last night. Being musicians, our little group hung out right in front of the sound board. I, however, being a huge tremonti fan had to get a closer glance. I walked around the side of the crowd and got like 3 to 5 feet from Tremonti. He is freaking amazing. It was in his zone. He looks like he is into the crowd, but his is really in the zone. He seems to be enjoying life doing what he loves to do. All the band appears that way. It was amazin to hear miles sing and hit every note. This far into the tour, one might think that he would screw up, but no complaints here. It was a fun time. Props to wes and kim for passing the free tickets our way. Thanks Guys you rock.

2 days till the surgery. I go from being nervous to not caring. I am trying to be very relaxed about it, especially due to the kids.

Feeling better

Wow it feels good to feel better.lol. Left work oned day early because I felt bad. Went in early another day because I felt bad. Worked all day. Must work tomorrow. No biggie all in a days work.

I have really been trying to work on my attitude and keep things positive, but it is hard to mix that when you don't feel well. I guess what I am trying to say is that sickness and being positive don't mix. One might ask why be positive. It takes way to much energy to be negative for one.Negative attitudes influence those around you to be negative. My philosophy for the new year. LIVE LIVE, LIVE the happy life. I am tire of feeling guilty and refuse to do it no more. Feeling guilty because I am happy and have a great life. If others don't, I still have compassion, I still care for others, but I don't let them reflect my mood. I want live this way everyday, but that is my goal.

Surgery in 6 days.

Hi-o-hi-o

That is what we need. If you haven't seen that episode of Northern Exposure you probably think that I have lost it for real this time.

Eric got me the first 2 seasons of Northern Exposure on DVD for Christmas. We have almost watched the first season. Hi 0 hi o was some natrual cure for the flu that Marilyn the indian receptionist came up with that cured the whole town including the dr of the flu.

It all started with Heidi to john to tara now it is to eric 6 days later. I don't know if he caught it from them or the gym. He said that the gym was flooded with people yesterday. I am a bit under the weather myself. I have that sinus cold still. WEll maybe we will get over this soon. Time will tell. Wha sucks is that I am supposed to work all weekend. I CAN"T BE SICK ARGH.

Well wishes to my man.

Bike riding log 2

Went on our second bike ride of 2005 today. Wow, I remember now why as a kid I loved riding my bike so much. I don't remember however getting sore in unmentionable places. hee hee. Anyway, it was major fun for sure. I need to do oiling on the chain on my bike. It rides well. We traded some speakers or something for this bike from our friend Kevin a couple of years ago I guess and I am just now enjoying it. what is up with that?

Our ride was from our home to the local school. I am going to measure it to see how far it is on my way to or from work one. It is probably about 2 mile round trip. It was quite fun. We took some of the side streets instead of taking the main street so the girls would not have to worry so much about trafic. We went around the school stopped at the playground for a few minutes and then headed back. So we rode a mile, then rested a few minutes then road another mile. That is pretty good. I am anxious to see how this tones my body. I will start doing my new yoga dvd tonight before I go to bed. That should be awesome. It feels good to be good to yourself.

Sickness makes committment fail

I have a horrible sinus cold. When I get like this, I just want to sleep and sleep and sleep. I am a sleeper anyway, but this just makes it worse. Yesterday, I slept in to long to go exercise. I had a ton of stuff to do before Holly's swim practice in the afternoon. So, I thought I would walk in the gym while she practiced. I was just to worn out. Today, I am making myself go walk in just a few minutes. I have to get back on the horse or I am going to loose my metabilism edge. I have been fortunate not to gain weight over the holidays. Thank God for that. I have to get my yoga mentality of peacefulness back that was so interupted over the holidays with family woes. The stress of some family situations probably has attributed to this sickness that I have. I have to get over this cold before I have surgery next week. It is a must. I am sure the yoga and exercise will help the cold and the drugs I am going to get at walmart.

What a weekend

It was great being off the past couple of days. We had Christmas with Eric's mom this weekend. We spread it out so my sister and law and her husband can come from Atlanta to celebrate and exchange gifts. It was not the best Christmas with them. Heidi got a virus on Thursday. She passed to John who passed to Tara who passed it possible to Eric. Not sure if e has it or not. We will find out tomorrow.He is not feeling well at all.

Tomorrow it is back to the grindstone on our goals. Get out of debt, get in better physical shape and focus on finding and maintaing true happiness not based on physical things. I mean true happiness.

Got a Yoga kit for christmas. It came with some work out dvd's, a mat, a rope, some blocks to help hold poses. It should be oodles of fun to start using.

Went biking on Saturday. Wow, it was at point mallard and we had a great time. the distance was a little long for the girls, but they made it.

Happy New year to anyone who reads this.

Trying to see the brightside..

Today was a not a good day for us. It started out bad because I woke up this morning at 2:30 and couldn't go back to sleep. So I got up and averaged grades and almost got that done. Then, I went back to sleep until 11:00.

I then called the car dealership, who was taking a look at my car to see what problem I had. They didn't find anything wrong and suggested that we needed new tires. So my sister came and took me to get my car. Eric met me at big 10 tires and we had new tires put on my car. The guy that did the job said he used to work at the dealership and that something something shaft was not getting enough grease or lube or whatever. So we took the car back to the dealership for the 2nd time and they fixed it.

So all is well right,wrong.

Heidi had not been feeling well all day. My mother in law watched them this afternoon. She called me at work to let me know that Heidi was running a low grade fever. ARGGHHH.

We are having Christmas this weekend with my mother in law and sister and brother in law. I really shouldn't complain because this is the 1st time we have been sick in awhile and it could be a lot worse, but I am only human.

So in the midst of all of this, I am trying to remain positive.


hee hee. Not doing to well.

Employee of the Month

That would be me. I recieved the honor of being employee of the month at office depot. Supposedly I will be recieving a $75 dollar gift card sometime in the near future. That is pretty cool.

Men if your stomach turns at the talk of periods and such skip this paragraph.

Hopefully, this month will be the last of bad menstrual cycles. I will be having an ebaltion done on January 14th. What they do is they go in do a dnc and a take pictures of the inside of the uterus. Then, if all is well, they insert a balloon into the uterus and fill it full of hot water and burn the lining out of the inside of the uterus. Thus there is little to no bleeding. I have some issues. Can't remember if I told about these are not. Either my uterus is growin into my uterine muscle or I have some long diesease that causes me to cramp really bad. I feel pretty much like I am in labor every month. My hope is that I will be able to hold off at least 5 years before I have the hysterectomy. Anyway, I am pretty excited about the whole thing. less pain is good. It is an outpatient procedure and I should be up and back to normal in a couple of days after the surgery. Any prayers would be appreciate it.


Ok now that is all the pms talk.

This weekend we will have Christmas with my husband mother, grandmother and sister. That should prove to be pretty fun. We always have a good time together. Anyway, I am almost finished with grades for the semester. I have 1 hr before bedtime and I am going to try to finish them.

Trying to get back on track.

Man,

How easy it is to fall off of a horse. The past 2 weeks, I have gone off splurging more on food than I have in awhile. I haven't gained any weight which is pretty remarkable considering what I have been eating and that I haven't exercised consistently. I decided that I would walk on my lunch break at work. Even though I walked for only 10 minutes, I felt better, and I felt that I accomplished something.

I have a tendancy to loose focus during the day on what I am doing so I am going back to a daily planning routine. Every night before I go to bed, I will plan the next day out by physical writing that down. It seems that I get more accomplished that way. I want to read the 8th habit by Steven Covey maybe that will help me focus more to.

Well, speaking of focussing, I have to work on grades and progress reports that have to be turned in on Jan. 15th and I think that I will do a little laundry before bed.

Wow, Christmas came and is almost gone!!!

It just isn't the same anymore. It is a good different though. I never thought that I would say that getting a present wasn't important to me. Just reflecting on what I got this year, here are some things that I got all year.

*another year with a wonderful husband
*2 healthy children
*one semi restored relationship
*New close friends
*new vision on my life
*a smaller waist line
*a healthy extended family

Those are the important things that I got this year. I guess to sum it all up, I got relationships.

Those are pretty darn important. I am thankful to God above for all he has blessed me with.

recap of the weekend

I have been very busy the last couple of days trying to catch up housework, christmas shopping, and working.

Friday,

We got up and got on the road a little later than we wanted to, but all was good. The ride there was beautiful. We had a couple of snags on the road through Chatanooga, but that is expected. Trucks locking up, people being stupid. We stopped in Natalahala. Wow what a great little spot. I loved it there. I got some great shots of the girls there.Then it was on to N.C. We finally made it to the cabin without getting lost. (I was giving directions). We had a nice dinner waiting on us. Typical Christmas dinner. It was delicious though. We toured the cabin and it was beautiful. It had 6 bedrooms and 3 baths. (I got the card, I see a friends weekend coming up in our future). After dinner we made Christmas ornaments from construction paper, coloring book pages, ribbon and glue. Very cute tree. After that we hung out for a bit and went to bed.

Saturday,

I woke up about 2:30 and couldn't sleep. I sat up and looked at the fire in our nice fireplace for about an hour and thought about how for breakfast I wanted some ham and eggs. I went back to bed and woke up the next morning and cooked some ham and eggs. Yummy!!! We all got ready and went into Ashville and went shopping. It was a cool town with a lot of cool shops. Then, we went back to the cabin and got ready for an amazing evening. We all got dressed up and headed to the Biltmore. For dinner, I chose the Lobster Bisque, Roasted Duck, Apple Cranberry cake (pie). It was very delicious. Then we headed for the tour. OH My Lord the House was beautiful. I can't even begin to imagine living in a place like that. It was huge and beautifully restored. There was a bowling alley and a swimming pool inside the house. For that time period, it is pretty amazing to think about it. There were 35 bedrooms and 43 bathrooms in the house. Amazing. We headed back home that evening and went to bed and awaited snow for the next day.

Sunday,

We woke up to no snow, few flurries. I decided that I wanted to get out of the house and explore my surroundings. So Tara and I took the girls, I wanted to give the grownups a break, and headed out. We drove in the mountains for several hours. The temperature kept rising as we left weaverville. It was pretty hillarous. Well, we stopped at the downtown toyshop. Holly and Heidi were not impressed. Sooo, we headed back to make a quick stop at the grocery store. We were in the store maybe 15 minutes and came out to a freaking blizzard. It was snowing harder than I have ever seen in my life. It was a beautiful sight.. The girls were very excited. When we got back to the cabin, they played in the snow and had a great time. That evening we, John actually, built a bonfire. We roasted hot dogs and made smores. Then the girls, Tara and I , took a slide down the hill on our natural sleds (our butts). IT pays to pack a booty in the snow. That was fun. After that, we all headed in to get warm. We played triva pursuit and headed to bed.


Monday,

We slept in. We had to be out by 11:00. So we did the normal packing thing. The line we were to travel on to get home was really the line the snow storm hit. We decided to go south. It added about 5 hours to our trip hom which was already 6 hours. So, if you do your math, that is 11 hours. yikes. Very long trip home, but very relaxing. We could have took the 6 hr trip, but it would have felt like 11 hours. So we chose less stress. yeah. We decided to go through helen Georgia. It was very beautiful . Then we had supper in Dalton, Georgia. Then it was home. I love the mountains. I love driving through them and seeing all of the beautiful overlooks. Eric and I are going to live there one day.


Tuesday- Wednesday

Back to work and daily grindstone. I will work tonight, but be off tomorrow and Saturday. Yippee.

Merry Christmas to anybody that does read this.


Be back next week.

WE had a great time!!!

I must say!! As ed grimley would have put it. We went to Ashville, NC this weekend and it was wonderful. I will detail much later. Right now, reality has set in,I must go to work.

Snazzy!!!!! 

All dressed up and somewhere to go!!!!! 

I hope blonde's have more fun!!

The reason that I hope blonde's have more fun is because I am one now. I got hightlights done today. ooooooo. I hope hubby will be happy with them. It will take some getting use to for me. It is a pretty dramatic change. We will see. I am kind of nervous about him seeing my hair. Most people would say it doesn't matter if he likes it do you? I however care what my prince charming thinks about what I look like. He looks at me more than I do. Thus, it is important. I am crossing my fingers and holding my breath.


I am excited about the trip I am about to go on to the Biltmore with the family. I am pretty excited. I here it nice there.

I am addicted to pretzels. 

I am addicted to hot chocolate. 

Oh the Pain

Got my eyebrows waxed today. owwwww. That hurts really bad. The way I get mine done is my grandmother heats this wax up and then she puts this hot burning wax on my eyes. Then she precedes to let it harden. After this, she takes tweezers and rips the wax off with eyebrows. Man beauty is pain.

A DAY OFF

That is what I need. Man, my real job has me working as of the last 3 weeks 5 days in a row without a day off. I now realize why eric stays pissy a lot or how he used to. He really has improved his disposition. The man can bring you down if you let him. This is day 5 and it was really tough not to be negative. I lost focus and got pissed off tonight at work. They had me going in 3 different directions and I was determined to finish 1 project. I ended up finishing most of my work. I have to continually remind myself that is just paper supplies. I have got to get back to practicing my walking yoga. I felt better when I did that. I had a time of reflection on a daily basis. I just have to get back into the routine of things.

A Fighting Disposition

That is my description of myself when playing board games or pretty much any sport. Dang it. I love to win. hee hee. A minor character flaw for some, but I love that fighting spirit within myself.

I started reading my acting books again. I haven't gotten very far, but I am determined to read them. I really want to focus in the near future on drama, theatre, tv, etc. I don't want to be famous, I just want to do what I love to do. I remembered something to. There is no basment in the alamo either.

In Loving Memory

In loving memory of Jenita Smith. She was killed in an automobile accident. She was one of my cheerleader sponser in college. She was so precious. I post a picture of books because she loved literature so much. She will be missed.

Feeling kind of sentimental

Maybe it is a result of high or low horomne levels. who knows? I can't sleep because I have to much going on in the old brain.This is the first time in a long time that this has happened. I ate some crackers and drank some milk and will try to get back to sleep soon. I lay in bed earlier thinking about how fortunate I am to be married to the most wonderful man in the world and have 2 great kids whom I love tremndously. We have some great friends. Although our life is not perfect, it has some great things in it. IN all reality, I am as happy as I can be on this earth.

I saw one of my directors in theatre tonight. I have decided to pick up my acting books that Eric bought me in Febuary and try reading them again. They are a bit beyond my way of thinking and intelect when it comes to preparing to be an actor and building a character, but I feel the need to try to stretch my way of thinking when it comes to this subject. I also am going to do some research on some other books that might intrest me on the subject of yoga.

I have to work this weekend so I will be pretty tied up with all of that. I am anxious to see the schedule for next week. I know that I will be off friday-Monday, so I look to work most of next week time will tell.

Getting back into the groove

It was nice to get back into the groove of my life yesterday. I hope that it will last for sometime. Thanksgiving and work have about shook my world upside down. I didn't have anything to do or anywhere to go yesterday and that enabled me to walk and get some much need house cleaning done. I still have plenty to do today, but I did get a lot done yesterday. I even got my tree decorated. yoohoo. I think the biggest adjustment for me is working 30 hour weeks and trying to juggle house, kids etc. Thank goodness Eric has stepped in to help. Hopefully after Christmas things will scale down at work a little and all will be well. I don't know how these supermoms do it. Work 40-60 hours a week and have kids to take care of and a house to take care of that would be impossible for me. I guess I am a big wimp. I can live with that though.

It was nice to get back into my yoga frame of mine. On my walk yesterday, the wind was blowing, the sun was shining. It was awesome to feel the presence of God through his creation and for just a few minutes focus on him alone.

Falalalalalal

It was cool today our homeschool group went caroling to an elderly home. These little old ladies were so sweet. They just loved to see the kids sing. It was fun to see them laugh and smile.

I am glad to be off for the next 2 days. That will be awesome. I actually don't have anywhere to go tomorrow except to start walking again. Rain or shine, I have to. If it rains we may ride over to the aquadome and walk there. So I may have one place to go. I have got to stay in shape for sure. I have been practicing my yoga poses still, but walking really makes a difference in relation to the poses.

I have a great husband. I love him very much.

Recap

Friday - shopping/ work/slash baking/bed
Saturday- Huntsville shopping/play rehearsal/poker night
Sunday-rewrite on the play/figure out bills/church/bake/play/dinner/game of life at Scott's/bed
Monday-is yet to be seen.


I love to watch people do card tricks. Really, I do. I think that it is super cool. I guess it is the little kid in me. I still get amazed that Santa can make it all around the world in one night to. And don't blow up my hopes and dreams by telling me that he is not real because I saw him, the real him on Christmas eve in my living room talking to my mom and dad. So, maybe he doesn't come to your house because you don't believe in him, but he comes to mine.

Making the little fortune teller things like we made in grade school and the poppers is pretty fun to.
http://www.enchantedlearning.com/crafts/origami/fortuneteller/

the kids in Sunday School reminded me how fun those things can be. It is crazy to me that they have lasted this long.

Work, moving, babysitting etc....

My week has been crazy, however, I haven't really lost it at all. I almost went off on this old lady at work one day. She was just hateful. She was asking me if we carried a certain item and I was asking her a question in return to make sure that I understood her and before I could even finish my question, she snapped at me. I was like hold that horse sister. I was thinking in my mind at first, I dare her to be ugly to me. Then, I felt sorry for her because she was either not well (mental) or she must have had some tragedy in her life to make her so hateful and bitter. It made me hope that I will never be an old bitty and that I will always be the nice old grandmother lady that makes you happy and smile. Kind of like Mrs. Clause.


My mom and dad moved all their stuff into their new house yesterday even though it was not totally complete. They had to move because the trailer that they were living in was being moved today. I went down and helped them move some stuff. It was a task. It made me feel good to help them. I was tickled actually. I got to babysit for mom (my sister kids that she keep m-f). That was cool. My mom and I made a intresting trip down to lake at like 11:00 monday to move some stuff that couldn't get wet due to the rain on Tuesday. Good thing we did. It was a nice trip of memories and remminissing. It was like old times when we used to spend a lot of time together.

Busy, but still foccused on peace and tranquility.

Work, Work, Work

Wow, I really have a job now. I have to work a total of 32 hours this week. The blogging will probably be minimal for me this week. I have tons to do. and I have to work everyday but Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday. Should be an intresting week.

The Last Thankful Post

I am thankful for the 50% off scratch ticket that I got at goody's this morning. yeah!!!!! That was freaking awesome. I am also thankful that I didn't get my DVD player from Sears. You win some you lose some. no problem. I am thankful that I had to work tonight. Mavis house was a very unbearable place to be I am told.

Being Thankful 5

Today, I will be thanful for friends and aquaintences.

I Samuel 20
16 So Jonathan made a covenant with the house of David, saying, Let the LORD even require it at the hand of David's enemies.
17 And Jonathan caused David to swear again, because he loved him: for he loved him as he loved his own soul.

In my lifetime, I have met few Jonathans, but I have managed to meet a few. I have one person that I am very thankful for and that is my friend Phylisha. She is like a Jonathan. It is sad that I don't spend more time with her than I do. I love her very much. She has loved me no matter what and we have both took an oath to always love one another.

Then there are friends that you meet in sections of your life. You may not keep up with them, but at that moment they have your back. I am thankful for those friends that try to understand me for what I am. They love me for me. They don't like me at there convience, nor do they try to change me to make them comfortable. They just love me for me. I am not going to make a list of you guys. You know who you are, and I love ya thanks for being my friend.


Then there are the quaintences these are people that just hang out with ya because you happen to be in the same circle they are in or you speak to on a weekly basis. I am thankful for them as well. It is nice to have a huge amount of people that you know will be there if ya need them.

All in all relationships are important, I am very thankful for any relationship that I am a part of.

Being Thankful 4

Today I was thanful for Family. I have been blessed all my life to be raised in believin in God by my parents. I am thankful for all of my family. my sister, whom I love dearly and brother in law and grandparents and nieces. They are precious. I have been blessed with another family that I married into. I have great in laws. Great sister and brother in law. In my description, I say that I live the fairy tale and it is even true down to family.

I can't say that there are not problems in my family, but thee is love there. When your famuly you must accept one another. No one gets left behind.

Being Thanikful 3

I am thankful for my kids. I have two beautiful girls. They are both pretty inside and out. I never could imagine being a mother could be so rewarding and wonderful. It is nice to be the mother of tmy girls. I stay on them all the time, but they are pretty good kids most of the time. They are both very unique in their own special way. God has taught me so much by having children. These 2 life lessons are worth every bit of pain I ever experienced.

Being Thankful 2

I am thankful for the most wonderful man in the whole wide world. I love him so much. He is the most passionate person that I know. He also has beautiful eyes. I look through them and see his inner soul. He is the most intresting person in the world to me. He has wonderful thoughts and ideas. Yes, he has his faults to, but the good things out weigh his faults beyond measure. He is my companion, He is my lover, He is everything I could ever want in a soul mate. My life is better for knowing him. I am thankful this holiday season and everyday of my life that I have been fortunate enough to love someone truly. Not only to love, but to be loved back is the most wonderful feeling that words will never be able to describe.

How Fortunate am I?

I am so fortunate. I have decided to blog about one thing a day that I am thankful for. I am thankful today for God. He is been so faithful to me. I can look back in my life and see him moving and guiding me. He has given me strength and courage to face really difficult situations and problems. No matter what I have been through. I have relied on my faith and belief system to carry me through. Taking all manipulation and falseness out, God is there. Just knowing that there is a creator out there who allowed me to live and experience what I have thus far is amazing. Just being able to see autumn come and see trees changing is pretty wonderful. Putting all doctrinal beliefs aside and just being thankful for Himby seeing the things that He has done is plenty enought to be thankful for.

HOLIDAY FUN

Had a good time today with the girls. We did theme pages on Thanksgiving for school. Fun stuff. They loved it. Tomorrow we will go to the Library and do a reading day. I am going to try to find the Cranberries Thanksgiving and some other books to on Thanksgiving. Then we have some holiday crafts to make and a Holiday Theme to write. It is cool to pass down those fun traditions during Holidays.


Had some pretty good stuff on clearance today at the Depot. Not stuff I would normally buy, but al ot of cheap stuff. I was unable to purchase stuff since I worked there. Evidently there is a manager descretion law at office depot. They ahd some sims games for 1. 00 and they had some jump start for 1:00 and warcraft game 1:00. Have some printers and laptops on Clearance. that is pretty much it. Have some dvd discs on sale. That makes for happy shoppers.

Get a Real Job!!!!

People who say housewives and mom don't have a real job need to keep my twin nieces that are 3 like I did today. I had 4 kids in the house. 9 year old, 7 year old, 2 3 year olds and a dog. IT was crazy. My anxiety came back. I even threw the yoga out the window. I don't think anything can prepare you to deal with that. Even thought it was hectic, it was nice keeping them. I love them so much and they are so inquisitive.

I love to cook. I cooked broccoli casserole and a yam casserole for dinner with Mac and cheese. It was mighty tasty. All is well, except I am ready to go to bed at 6:00. I have been up for over 12 hours that is a stretch for me. LOL.

Culturalized

I love attending cultural stimulating events. The girls and I went and saw Discover Dance prestented by Fine Arts in Birmingham at the Princess Theatre. Even though there were just kids dancing, it was pretty good. I enjoyed swan lake the best. Otherwise, I had a pretty bad day focussing on the things that I have tried to practice recently. I kind of was ill today. I could blame it on a lot of things, but it is my fault for losing focus of the simplicity of this life. Tomorrow is another day and I will try again.

Our new doggie, Mia 

See the itty bitty ducks 

Nice again to get out into nature

Taking Grandmother to the dr was a great thing. Afterwards, we went out and drove around the reid, west limestone, swan creek area. It was nice to get out and see the leaves changing colors and just get away from this BIG City we live in. It is big enough that is for sure. I got to thinking about how fortunate we are that we could drive 15min. - 1:00 away from decatur and get to nature. Some nice places away from it all that you can see many things and experience quietness, peace and many things. I am trying to do this at least once a week so my perspective on life is encouraged. We also went to a park across from Athens State College. There are a lot of ducks that fly in there . Usually we take them bread, but the bread thrift store was closed that we usually go to. So we just went an looked and the pretty ducks. It was all nice.

People wonder why kids are so spoiled and disobedient

You go to work in retail in America and you will figure it out. Kids learn by example for the most part. They learn by someone's example. People that come through at work think that everything should go perfect and that they should not have to wait and that they should be waited on before anyone else. I don't get upset, I just apoligize and try to understand there frustration. Your attitude is reflection of your anticipation. If you expect all the consumers to be nice then you will definitely have a bad attitude because that is not reality. If you expect that you have some good and bad apples, then you can have a great day knowing that some people are just jerks and that you don't have to be like them. So next time, I go into a store, I am going to be more concious when my service sucks or when my order gets messed up because stuff happens and I as a true American don't have to be spoiled, and hateful, but in someway can spread God's love through someone else's imperfection.


Had a nice evening Friday with the hubby and some friends. It has been a long time since we just hung out at the house and just watched tv.

I weighed tonight and still haven't put on any more pounds suprisingly. I praise God for that, he has given me knowledge and helped me turn that into wisdom by truly learning moderation with food. My food addiction is totally in remission.I don't always eat healthy and work on that coninuosly, but for the most part, I eat in moderation and by learning that principle and trying to apply it in every aspect of my life, I will be a better person.

I wished that I would have found this peaceful place that I am in many years ago. I mean I have always been a happy go lucky person, but to work in retail and deal with selfish, hateful people and still be able to smile. IT is all because of my faith in God that I can feel the way I feel at this moment.

Great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised in the city of our God, in the mountain of his holiness.Beautiful for situation, the joy of the whole earth, is mount Zion, on the sides of the north, the city of the great King. God is known in her palaces for a refuge. For, lo, the kings were assembled, they passed by together They saw it, and so they marvelled; they were troubled, and hasted away. Fear took hold upon them there, and pain, as of a woman in travail. Thou breakest the ships of Tarshish with an east wind. As we have heard, so have we seen in the city of the LORD of hosts, in the city of our God: God will establish it for ever. Selah. We have thought of thy lovingkindness, O God, in the midst of thy temple. According to thy name, O God, so is thy praise unto the ends of the earth: thy right hand is full of righteousness. Let mount Zion rejoice, let the daughters of Judah be glad, because of thy judgments. Walk about Zion, and go round about her: tell the towers thereof. Mark ye well her bulwarks, consider her palaces; that ye may tell it to the generation following. For this God is our God for ever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death. Psalms 48.

Sharon!!! Where is the Alcohol?

We had Thanksgiving dinner after our homeschool classes today. I sat with several moms and we were talking about how we couldn't believe how our mom's used to let us watch grease (the movie), and movies like that. When one of the mom's told us her son did a great impression of Ozzie O. He came over to the table and she preceded to ask him to do the impersonation and he was a little bashful, but as he walked away from the table In the middle of the church we meet in which is a baptist church. He says in his Ozzie voice Sharon!!! Where is the alcohol? His mom's face turned a little red. She was only expecting him to say Sharon!! The added line cracked us all up. Then we started talking about SNL and one of the other moms said I am gumby dammit right there in the church. IT was so freakin funny. I about lost it. I thought that lunch was very entertaining.

I love teaching kids. It is so much fun. My pe classes on Thursdays is great. The kids whine sometimes about do I have to play and etc, but all in all they really want to and have fun when they participate. I have about 50 students in all. They are broke up into 4 classes. So the size of each class is pretty nice.


I actually got a nap today that was really nice. I guess that is why I am up at this moment. I got called into work for 3 hours tonight. That was cool. More monay to pay of debt. They gave us a free turkey for Thanksgiving it came with our checks.

Going to the lake tomorrow morning to help paint and check out the progress of mom and dad's house. Should be relaxing and fun.

Testing the real

Well had 2 people call in at work today. That meant I had to work the register by myself. I am not fully trained to operate such a contraption. It is more than just scan something and hitting total. I am required to do purchase orders, returns, exchanges, tax exempt stuff, etc amd answer the phone. So it is not will that be check, cash or charge. It discount cards and etc. Anyway, I could have had a worse night, but I put into practice somethings that I have been reading about lately and I have to say that they worked. I can't lie, At one point, I was a nervouse wreck it was a deer head lights moment. I had 3 people in line, 2 people on the phone and everyone was buys helping someone in the store. At that moment I decided to make a concious choice to breath and go to my quiet place and just relax. It really worked to just count to 10 and say hey I am just going to do what I can and the rest I will apologize for. I must say that my pleasantness to the customer while they waited helped the customer be calm to. I had one lady out of the 50-75 people I waited on get a little upset at me, but that was ok it wasn't like she slapped me she just said I could make you re wring that up and then give me my advantage discount, I said I can do that for you maam if you would like and she declined.

So the norm would have been me having a nervous breakdown, but I survived and did it with a happy relaxed positive attitude. All because I have determined with God's help that I am not going to let what I can't change effect me. I am going to do what I can and just say screw the rest in the most positive manner possible

Finding the real

the song below has some awesome lyrics. It is really where most of the peeps I hang out want, to find the real. I am hopefully hitting the surface of what will be the real for me. I read some more in another book tonight about some health issues that I am facing and how yoga can help. It is amazing that our health is effected by what we put in our bodies. If we get headaches, have rough womenly cycles, back aches it all points to diet, exercise, and stress.

With out further delay Here is the song enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Find the real alterbridge!
Stuck in the middle I burrow insideBack to the cradleAway from the burdens of all my crimesBefore it’s fatalMy past has found me the truth’s come outAll is rememberedWith no place to fall but straight downI must surrenderWell it seems I’veFinally thought of everythingI wanna loveI wanna feelFind peaceFind the realThere’s a face I put on all my lifeThe face of an angelBut I look in the mirror only to findThe face of a strangerAnd with all I’ve taken I hunger for moreCause I’m selfishAnd all I’m left with is a crown of thornsAnd I’m helplessWell it seems I’veFinally thought of everythingI wanna loveI wanna feelFind peaceFind the realI’ll trade these lies for something rightI’ll kill what hurts with something pureI will be redeemed so I can breathe againWell it seems I’veFinally thought of everythingI wanna loveI wanna feelFind peaceFind the realWell it seems I’veFinally thought of everythingI wanna loveI wanna feelFind peaceFind the real

Connecting with the lIfe Source

I love the book I am reading still. I read yesterday some, it was very inlighting. It discussed connecting to the world of nature and people around us. It is pretty amazing when we disconnect with our problems and focus on the reality of all living things around us. It seems our problems can become so small in view of the great life source around us. I know that so many times aI allow my focus to zoom into the inside of myself and I get so angry and upset and twisted that I about have an emotional breakdown. I am going to try to start focussing on the big picture and focus on getting intune with the harmony of life going on around me.

I also read how what is going on around me, my attitude and the thoughts that drive me effects how I carry myself . It effects how I physically feel. If I want to be mentally, emotionally, spirtually, and physically healthy, I have to lead a more postitive lifestyle. I can't throw my problems out the window, but when things get so overwhelming, I just need to stop and count to 10 and breath. And try to find a simple soulution to whatever is facing me.

This book reminds me of the 7 habits book. It is very powerful and uplifting.


I am so happy that we have added a new edition to our family today. Her name is Mia. She is a pug and she is very cute. She has finally settled in and is trying to sleep a little. It is amazing how demanding a dog can be.

The most stressful place on the planet....

has to be Walmart. I went grocery shopping in there. I tried not to get to stressed out, but it is impossible for me not to have a panic attack every time I go in there. My chest hurts, I can't breathe. I know how stressful it is to work there and that is why it is so stressful to shop there. It is all insane. I am glad that I work for a more relaxed company now. I love my new job so far.

While in Walmart, I ran in to reggie this guy that works there. He made a record and he is now selling them. I want to buy one just to be supportive to him because he had done this album on his own and he is selling it on his on. I am not to totally sure what type of music it is, but I am pretty sure it is r and b. I heard he can really sing well. The cost of the Album is 10. 00 if anyone is intrested in supporting an aritist that is doing things the right way.

'SNL' auditions to become reality show

I read this article this morning. I would love to be on SNL. That would be like a dream come true. Even if it was just for one episode. HMMM. I will have to scheme away to get to one of those auditions. I wonder if they will let old people play. hmmm.

LOS ANGELES, California (Hollywood Reporter) -- The always fierce competition among comics to land a gig on NBC's "Saturday Night Live" is set to become the basis of a reality series for the network.
Sources said NBC is working on a reality-competition series fronted by "SNL" creator/executive producer Lorne Michaels. The project would chronicle a group of comedians vying for a grand prize that is believed to be a role on the long-running sketch comedy series.
Michaels is expected to play a Donald Trump-like role, winnowing the pool of contestants until a victor is selected. Sources indicated that the project is eyed for a possible summer launch. NBC declined comment.
Michaels got his taste of getting tough on reality series contestants in a "SNL" parody skit of NBC's reality hit "The Apprentice" last season, in which he took over Trump's role and "fired" cast member Jimmy Fallon.
NBC already has a track record in turning talent searches into a successful reality series with "Last Comic Standing."

EXIT

Hmm this could stem to a lot of topics, but I want to just focus on the one at hand. The election. I stayed up late to watch the results. I was not really concerned on who won, even though I did vote. I was more intrested in the educational side of things. the electoral college, popular vote, which states picked who etc.... It was very intresting to me.

It is sad that we have a country so divided. It doesn't look good to the rest of the world. Hopefully, ever who is declared the winner will focus on uniting our country. It is in my opinion the #1 priority. " A house divided against itself cannot stand." Jesus, Abraham Lincoln and others.

It is rainy here today. Makes me want to sleep all day, even though, I am not aloud. I have much to do. School work, house work, and a few errands.


I think the song for today is Rainy days and post election days always get me down. lol

Busy Day

Yesterday was a busy day. It was nice after it was all over to just sit down and relax last night watch a little tv. IT was nice to be able to be at home and cook supper. It was nice to sit down and eat with the family. It is back to work tonight and Thursday. I like the job ok. I look to start working a little bit more after one of my managers asked me how many hours can you work in one week. So, we will see Thursday when the schedule comes out if I get to add another day. I wouldn't mind it really. 4 days a week would be a great thing. IT would allow me to make what I original wanted to with this job.


Can't skip over the election issue. I still don't know who I am going to vote for. I am really torn about what to do. I guess I wlll know when I go in the little booth. Maybe I will play one potato two potato two potato four. You really are getting the same thing, it is just packaged a little different. So We will see.